When my second son was about eight months old I volunteered as a helper in the Bible Story Room for VBS. The woman who had volunteered to teach was significantly more than twice my age and was brand new to the church. I guess we all figured she had experience, but no one really knew her. We quickly found out that she wasn't interested in teaching the Bible to children; she had an agenda of her own. She aspired to write and perform country songs, and her purpose for being there seemed to be to have a captive audience. At about twenty-four years of age I worked to steer the class time back to the Bible Story and give the kids something they could apply to their lives. I wasn't prepared to teach the lesson since I was only helping, but I tried to point the kids to the truth. The woman I was working with could have sought to use music to bring glory to God, but instead she used the class for her own purpose. I'm not sure that I ever saw her at church again after that week.
Paul wrote in Philippians 1, "It is true that some preach Christ out of rivalry and envy, but others out of good will. The latter do so out of love, knowing that I am put here (in prison) for the defense of the gospel. The former preach Christ out of selfish ambition, not sincerely, supposing that they can stir up trouble for me while I am in chains. But what does it matter? The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached. And because of this I rejoice."
The lady in my story wasn't really preaching the gospel at all, but she certainly is a case of misguided intentions. Her objective might have kept the kids from hearing God's word, but He had other plans that would not allow that to happen. I am not suggesting that she intentionally attempted to prevent God's word from being taught, just that teaching it was not her purpose. Perhaps she heard something that would later change her life. I'll probably never know. So do motives matter? Whether the issue is teaching, feeding the hungry or healing the sick, I think Paul's message applies to the outcome for the recipients: they are taught, fed and healed. For the individual with a selfish agenda, they will end up frustrated unless the Holy Spirit changes their hearts. I think it is important to examine ourselves often for false motives, and when we see that we have been doing something for the wrong reason, ask God to change our perspective.
My oldest son questioned his reason for singing in the church choir, and decided that it was best for him to give that up. He mostly stays in the back helping out with sound and projection, but also plays bass on the youth worship team. A little over a year ago I had to step away from the worship team for a couple of months because I needed to reevaluate my objective in that ministry. Thankfully, the Lord used the time to teach me so that I could return with a new perspective. I recently had a disagreement with a friend who I thought was pushing their own agenda, but then I had to step back and consider what my "spin" was. I'm still not sure how that will all turn out, but I am looking at things from different angles now and trying to make sure that I really have the good of everyone in mind as I was first convinced that I did. Life is full of learning and growing, and for me, evaluating why I do what I do.
